Gatvol… the state of having had enough & how to choose joy every day.

I have always thought of myself as an eternal optimist. Being an introvert, my facial expressions may not always exhibit my optimism accurately but I promise you, it glows brightly there on the inside.

I choose to focus on the positive, not reading the doom and gloom articles, not watching the latest sensationalist gory news. Not that I deny that there are awful things happening in the world but I know what I can control and what I can’t. Wherever there is suffering in the world, I send love and compassion or prayers, whatever you want to call it.

I believe that energy flows where attention goes, therefore I choose to focus my energy on the good in life. The down side is never the first thing I think of. On the inside, I am very much a flower child who has never quite grown up. By now I am quite comfortable with that and I am more than happy with never growing up.

What matters to you?

I know what is important in my life. I know who and what I WANT TO spend my time on. The point of this life is joy! Love, special moments, beautiful things, new experiences, happy memories, smiles from the heart… these are the only things that are truly meaningful.

But there are those moments when I wake up in the middle of the night and I’m overwhelmed by the heaviness of the “stuff”. All the stuff that we’re bogged down with in this man-made world.

There are days when all the noise is so deafening that it brings me to my knees… and the most ridiculous thing is that it is nothing more than noise.

The deadlines, the bills, the constant, round-and-round, never ending fucking rat race that has become our existence is sickening to me.

The fakeness. The shallowness. Everywhere you look you’re being sold something… “the hook”. They will even tell you that you can do it too! You don’t have to be an expert in the field to sell a course that will make you squillions of dollars! All you have to do is market it right (just like so-and-so) and the money will roll in of its own accord… but ONLY IF you buy so-and-so’s seven special courses which are only available for a limited time.

What???

Can we press a reset button somewhere? Can we live a life where the real stuff matters? How do idealists actually cope in this world?

Where’s the emergency exit?

However much we try to keep the positive, there’s no getting away from the way our lives have been engineered. Money rules. Unless you can get “off the grid”, plant your own food and live outside society, you are in the middle of that rat race whether you like it or not. It may not be an important thing in the bigger picture of the universe but if you don’t have it, you’re pretty much screwed.

Well I am over it, so very, very over it. I choose to focus on what’s real and true. I choose kindness, authenticity and happiness.

Each to their own and all that… so those who are all about that life can hustle and grind in their own corner. Maybe one day when they’re 80 years old they will be at peace with having missed special times and be able to justify it to themselves. Of course there are those with the “suck it up” mentality too. “That’s life”. Well, no thank you. Nobody else determines my life.

I want to do all things with love, living in the present with my family and friends. Doing work that I love, that fulfills me and being able to take pride in every single thing I take on. I surrender the rest. I am letting go.

Choose joy, every day!

Now, as much as it is a choice, it’s a choice that must be made daily (sometimes several times a day) to make sure that you don’t get swept away by the current. No complaining! You need to constantly refocus, look inside yourself and find a place of clarity.

Meditation is my remedy. As often as possible (and I’m not going to say every single day because that’s just not realistic) I start my morning with a guided meditation, hopefully a few pages of writing, and that lifts the worries. Throughout the week, when I’m driving around during the day I listen to podcasts and I always find inspiration from it. The key is to keep that fire burning, keep fueling it with more inspiration and endless amounts of GRATITUDE!

I want my children to dream big, to live lives striving for learning, growth and joy – and to know that they can choose that. I hope that they will be able to see that in my life one day. That will be enough.